Vital Questions - I

 

There are four  vital  questions we need to answer, before make any changes:

1 - Where do I stand now (understanding your comfort zone:  beliefs, fears, habits  both conscious and unconscious)

2- Where do I want to go (Goal)

3- Why I want to do this (intention)

4- What will keep me on going (motivation)

Sometimes  people merge them in to two questions (1&2) and (3&4) but I think the more detailed and clear we are at this level, more strategise and options we could have during the process. By answering these vital questions, we could move the next level of `How`

Where do I stand now

When you ask your car GPS  guiding you to a specific address, the first thing it does is finding your current location. And it`s true for any change we want to make in our life, discovering our position.

The coordinate of our current location is determined by our comfort zone boundaries: beliefs, attitude, behaviors, fears and habits. More than 90 percent of what  we think, feel and do are being done unconsciously. It means that at 90 percent of situations we are reacting on Auto Pilot mode!!! This where our habits are being formed too.

Habit is not a bad things at all. It is a  revolutionary brain mechanism, for learning and  saving our energy from redo`s. For example imagine if  every day  you need to try making your coffee, tying  your shoes or pulling back your car out of the garage, like the very first time. You needed to spend lots of time and energy to redevelop those cognitive and physical skills. And this is most likely same at our mental level of perception, thinking pattern and decision making. We`ve developed out mental habits during the years through our personal experiences and social forces, both consciously and unconsciously. And after a while we just left our mind control to auto pilot.

"We first make our habits, and then our habits make us." - John Dryden

Self-awareness, is the first step of change. It`s a never ending  process of self observation, discovery and insight. The more you go through this process, the more precise you can locate where you stand and how you got there. Sometimes, the energy and joy of the self-awareness is huge enough that could make instant effortless changes. Such 'Aha ' moments of transformation may not last forever but they have strong impacts on the long term path of change.

 

 

Like opening a spinning wool braid, self-awareness is  distinguishing  all different colored boundaries of mind and recognize each of them separately. There paradox is that we need a quiet to do that!

 There are too many methodologies, models and  techniques for self-awareness. Try to find the and employ the one that mostly fits you, but be flexible enough to study others as well. Usually such techniques recommend to have  a coach, at least at the beginning.  The coach may not be the super hero you were looking for or a lifetime role model. He/she needs to be knowledgeable and honest  enough with you to support and guide you from the mind traps.

His/her main role is helping you to make your mind quiet  to open the wool braid.